1.06.2011

Things a Guy Would Never Admit Too and a Sweet Cocktail

Since I was ill on Monday, I was given a pass by my wonderful wife and agreed to write for Thursday.  Enjoy!!
Like most men, I would like to think that I am as manly as they come. Sure we may slip at times and let the macho attitude go, but when we do, usually one of our buddies is there to collect our Man Card. Here are a few things a guy would (probably) never admit too:

Reading Women’s Magazines –
So you’re at your buddy’s house watching a game and have to use the bathroom. You go to the bathroom for a while and there’s nothing to read but a few copies of Cosmo, Vogue and Elle lying around. Sure the cover may look appealing but when you get out you won’t start talking about the great article on moisturizers you read in Cosmo, you simply say, “Sorry, I was answering e-mails on my blackberry. What’d I miss?” Just be sure you don’t tell him the score you got on the quiz you just took.

Crying –
There are only a few times when this is appropriate: 1. A death in the family 2. Getting hit in the family jewels 3. Losing in the finals of your fantasy football league. All other times will be followed by excuses. If you notice your man tearing up at a sad or sappy movie, it’s probably because he just scratched his eye or was cutting up an onion when he went to get a drink.

Watching “Chick Flicks” or Shows -
You never hear a man talking about what was on Oprah the day before or how sexy Jacob looks with his shirt off in Twilight (OMG I know, right). Nope it’s ESPN or the Discovery channel. It’s that simple.

Acknowledging another Guys Looks -
Women do this all the time to other women. Judging on looks or the way they act. You get two men together and its talk about sports, cars, hunting etc. But the same two men will walk around a YMCA buck naked and not care or point out flaws in the other man. Also, if you point out another man to yours and ask if you think he’s cute, you’ll probably get an answer such as 1. I didn’t even notice or 2. Who cares.

Being Lost –
It doesn’t matter where you have to drive to, a man will never be lost. He can use the sun to navigate during the day and the stars at night. Who needs a GPS; those things are wrong most of the time anyway.

ManScaping –
This would be regular maintenance because no one wants a man to take his shirt off, just to look at his sweet sweater vest underneath. Sorry, but you can use your imagination about the rest. He has to keep himself looking and feeling good about himself. See below.

Flexing in Front of the Mirror –
After a session of ManScaping and a nice hot shower using his loofah and body wash, it’s time for a little gun show. He has to make sure the Biceps and Triceps are in good working order, but walking in on the “Arnold Schwarzenegger Classic”, you’ll probably just hear him say he was just stretching his arms.

Drinking “Girlie Drinks” –
No two ways about it, a man wants beer or whiskey. If he were sitting next to Chuck Norris, what do you think he would order? No, Appletini’s, Mojito’s or Cosmo’s happening here, its beer or whiskey.

Well bottoms up!!!  Lets have a drink!!



Chocolate Kiss Martini
Ingredients
2 oz Vodka
¾ oz Godiva Chocolate Liqueur                                
¾ oz Pallini Raspicello

Mixing Instructions
Pour liquid ingredients into shaker filled with ice, shake, strain into Martini glass. Drop in Hershey's kiss and serve. (For added flair, ahead of time dip rims of chilled martini glasses into melted bittersweet chocolate and chill until set.) Add a strawberry or Raspberry for garnish.

15 comments:

Blogs said...

I've never had this but it looks divine! i'm not a huge chocolate drinker but will try! men are funny-i see mine flexing and it's oh so funny! and he drinks straight up hard core shit on the rocks too! i cannot do it!:) have a great day guys! hope everyone is feeling better!

Cathy Kennedy said...

Interesting, hubs got in on the blog action. My DH is like, "Blogging? Nah!" I just get understands smiles which means, if this makes you happy then it works for me.

I appreciate your visit and hope you'll return again, and again, and again!

Happy Thursday and New Year!

Unknown said...

I never knew that:) Great post, and love that drink!

Following your lovely blog and inviting you to add this at http://olahmomma.com/momlounge - a mommy blogger directory and more, where you can also meet more mom bloggers like you and get connected with them by visiting your profile after registration.

You can also add there your giveaways and business links; get featured by sharing your crafts, recipes and interesting musings.

Following us back is deeply appreciated. Thanks and have a great day!

http://olahmomma.com -- blogging and connecting blogging moms.
{all moms welcome}

Rachel said...

I've had a chocolate martini before- they are wonderful!! :)

The comment about Jacob with his shirt off made me laugh!

Love the blog, glad I found you! Have a fab day!

:)
Rachel

(Single)Mommy said...

haha soo true!

I'm a new follower from the Thirsty Thursday blog hop! I'd love if you'd follow me back @ http://myadventures-in-mommyland.blogspot.com/

Adventures said...

Thanks for the follow I am following you back!

Unknown said...

Hi, I'm following you back.

OurHopeIsInTheLord said...

Hi,
I'm following you from friday blog hop, hope you will follow back.
Have a blessed weekend
April

Mel said...

New follower from the blog hop and also joined yours below but comments must be closed. Looking forward to visiting at least every Weds! What a guy to have write a blog post for you. Mine would never and the drink posted sounds awesome, even if I don't drink!

Please feel free to stop by: Trailing After God

Unknown said...

That was quite fun to read.

(and i do not watch chick flicks/shows, either.)

Thanks for sharing !

(visiting from the Friday Hop & voting for your blog)

HBrummett said...

Hello! Thanks for joining us at the Hop Along Friday! I follow you via google and twitter. I look forward to your updates! If you are not already please follow my twitter and facebook too! Have a wonderful Friday! ~HEather
www.livingonloveandcents.blogspot.com
www.facebook.com/livingonloveandcents
www.twitter.com/loveandcents

betty-NZ said...

That drink looks sooo yum!!

Jonie Marie said...

Ha Ha! That is so true! The best part is that most guys that would read this would probably deny all of it. They just can't handle the truth! :)

Following you back!

Jonie
easyascutandpaste.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

This entry made me giggle. Very nice.

I came over here from the Raising My 5 Sons blog hop. Very cool that guy guys have a family blog with more than one author!

Unknown said...

That cocktail has me drooling! I love chocolate and martinis, so I'm thinking this is a match made in heaven! I am following you from the Slumber Party!

www.theelephantstrunk42.blogspot.com